Shiver

Again I wait forever to write again. It is something I truly do love to do, when I get around to it. It is not something that I do enough.

I have been reading this book called Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater.

This book is about werewolves, but there is a twist. They aren't monsters. They just turn into real wolves. They only turn when the weather begins to get cold. After a while, the time they spend as human gets less and less and the time they are a wolf is more. Sam has been trying to hold on to his humanity and the way he has been doing that is he has fallen in love this this girl, Grace who was attacked and bitten when she was younger. She is the only person who has been bitten but hasn't changed.

Reading about the way they are with one another and the love that they show for one another bring back both memories and longing. It brings back memories of the way Bryan and I were. I mean we weren't always that touchy-feely, but when we were, it was so nice.

The longing I get is when I start to wish for someone who loved me so much that they wanted to be contact with me. Like if we were to go shopping, they want to hold my hand or put their arm around me. Almost in a "She's mine" kind of way.

Basically I want to feel wanted. I want to feel special to someone. I want to make someone feel special. I want to be able to be that kind "queen" to my "king". I want someone to protect and to hold. Someone I can love and spend time with. Someone that I can talk to about anything and everything and they will listen and tell me all their thoughts and secrets too.

I know God has someone out there. I guess I am just being impatient because we humans are social creatures. We like companionship.

I just feel like my companion-ship has sailed.

Haha cheesy, yeah, but I am tired and want to write something to get my thoughts down.

Until next time,
Rina